What Turns You On?

I used to think there were topics I would just NEVER be able to write about. Some because I had no experience and didn’t feel like I knew what I was talking about even after doing research.

So writing BDSM? No. Oh nononono. I couldn’t possibly go there because I’d look stupid as soon as someone who did know what they were doing there read my story. Surely, even with reading blogs and books from both points-of-view (D and s), I’d hork something up and get laughed at.

Then one of the “voices” in my head turned out to be a Dom. I had to then write a short story about a D/s relationship that was slowly falling apart after a hate crime made this Dom question whether he could or even should play with his boy again. Love him? Yes, he’d always love him, but he couldn’t ever hurt him, cause him pain, after the hell he’d been through. Could he?

No one was ever supposed to see Jenner’s Needs, so the pressure was off, but I realized that all I needed to get over the “no I can’t do it” hurdle was find something that turned me on about the situation and run with that. The turn-on was trust: Viktor had to trust in his skills as Jenner’s Dom and believe Jenner’s trust in him wasn’t misplaced. Did I get everything right with the BDSM scene I wrote? Dunno. Maybe I did. I think I got the trust between Viktor and Jenner right, though, and I’m OK with that.

Now cheating? Open relationships? So very not going there because I cannot understand taking him back or sharing him.

Er… Well…

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While writing about Stasi Manolis and his fraternity brothers for Your Biggest Fan, I introduced the idea that Stasi had had a threesome with two of them, specifically Mpenda and Bastian. Stasi’s reasoning was that there was comfort and safety in hooking up with a friend instead of someone anonymous…and that a threesome was just hot. Later, once Stasi’s with Truman, he no longer wants to be with anyone but Truman, while Mpenda opens the door to Stasi bringing Truman along.

Mpenda’s young, sexually adventurous, and comes from a place where survival is really all you can hope for and every moment had better matter. Mpenda loves his friends and sex is one way he expresses that. It’s a fundamental part of who he is. What if Bastian loves Mpenda, but Mpenda refuses monogamy? Does Bastian stay?

So the 3rd book in the series, F_ck Labels, will now feature an open relationship from the points-of-view of one who needs that and one who needs to accept it or leave. Again, I think it’s the trust involved that turns me on, but also the naughty little devil inside me that maybe wouldn’t mind watching my man “perform” with someone else or might just be able to go over and assist another in thoroughly debauching him. Hmm…

I’m now thinking maybe there aren’t any topics I can’t or shouldn’t write about. Maybe everything’s possible, provided I can find that one element about it that turns me on.

What could turn you on to reading about a topic you’ve always considered a no-go for you? “I’d never read about ____…unless maybe there was some ____ in it.” Or what did you think you’d never want to read about that you pushed yourself to actually read and discovered you like it because of ____?